- Age / Gender:
- 19, Male
- Austin TX
- All Stats >
I am quite fond of horror films.
- Community Stats
Level 42 Artist
Ranked as Colonel
Contact Info / Websites
Disclaimer: This has loads of dumb personal bullshit in it and has nothing to really do with any art/animation projects. Well, that stuff is in the first paragraph.
Hello. It's very apparent that I have not made a post in quite some time. Of course, I respond to reviews, private messages, and post a fuckload of art here, my Tumblr, a Facebook, but I've been somewhat absent-minded when it comes to making a new post, especially when there's still the question of what exactly happened to DotM Overtime. I don't plan to write out another blog as to what's going on with it, but some of the things I have to say will kinda paint the picture a bit clearer. In regards to Overtime, I'll work on it when I can, or when I finally realize the opportunity to work on it once again.
These past few months have been somewhat rocky for me, but I'll go ahead and state right off the bat that I don't think I've ever really been happier. The household I was living in had been deteriorating for quite some time as years progressed and all efforts of rationality had been sucked completely fucking dry. The reluctant role of parent had clearly been too much for this woman in the past with her other children, and it was only natural that the time would come for me too. I guess the other ones got lucky in not having to see exactly what this person was capable of after a life exhausted of terrible decisions, suffering within them, attempting to dull it with drinking, and the failure to realize the dangers of drifting into cycles where progression isn't even a factor. She has successfully dismantled the structures of all that is around her and I do not expect any recovery. It's humorous to think back that the final straw for me all stemmed from an action of mine, which had been not leaving enough milk for her morning coffee and a few dishes rinsing off in water in the sink, and then my following attempt to apologize, which was met with violence and a few other broken laws entirely on her part. Just something more to complain about just for the sake of complaining. No effort to construct, rebuild, teach, anything. Just take it in all on herself, attach it to her unhappiness, and use whomever crossed her path as a scapegoat. With the aid of a police officer, I was able to safely collect my belongings and leave that night.
So technically I've been homeless for the past few months, but I've found ways. I've worked up, and I'm in what I see as a definite progression towards a successful direction. Sure I was left without a job, without an income, without savings, any place to go, no family, etc, but nothing ever bothers me now. I no longer have to have the mental strain of a confused woman who does not see her wrongs, recognize good deeds, and endlessly sweeps shit under the rug. I've been waiting for this for quite a long time. It's been something I've looked forward to since early on in my life, when all I had then was just a feeling that things could go terribly wrong. Sure I wasn't the best kid a few times, didn't take responsibility for a few things here and there, but I didn't really get into trouble or put up pointless fusses. Any responsibility I had was taken away by her, so she could put it on herself and add it to her pathetic list of bullshit hardships that she could mask up. She'll just keep drinking herself to rust as she pointlessly proclaims her pathetic, unorganized attempts at being a fucking medicinal prophet or whatever she thinks to accomplish (which in and of itself is just another way she can scapegoat whatever comes near her and admonish herself from responsibility of.)
Of course all of this may have fucked up my growth as a child and who I've become. But I'm still young and the things I have to learn, the things in the world I have to see, everything I need to go through is finally in my sights. She kept me there, sheltered, away from everything. Perhaps because I'm the youngest child, perhaps because she wanted a punching bag. Either way, I've made it away from there, and I'm looking forward to 2014. I've got a job I absolutely love, a great collective of savings, and plans for my future that do not involve a single whimper from her.
But yeah, haven't heard a single thing from her or anyone, and I really don't care at all. I'm not going to continue a cycle that leads to nothing but unhappiness and destruction. I'm making my own way from this point on ready to learn and start anew.
Recent Game Medals
Total Medals Earned: 994 (From 124 different games.)